My fingers are tired from keyboard typing. I have been on the computer for the last few hours, searching for English Teacher positions in Alcala/Madrid area. I was surprised at the amount of idioma schools in Alcala. I went through the whole list, pulling of names, numbers, and for those that had them, email addresses. I sent out resumes and resumes. I assume that out of all the places that I contacted, at least one has to be in need for some extra help.
I don't know what my plan is for this summer. I can feel a lot of things changing, at least for my students wise. I know a few of them that want to continue, but already a few our drifting off, and once vacations come, its all down hill from there. I hope to use the time I have as best/wisely as I can.
I feel terrible today, because I received an email from Maribel threatening to discontinue our intercambio if I shape up and contact her once in awhile. I think she is frustrated with me, because I have been so busy and I never give our commitment the time of day. I feel terrible, and I really want to show her that i am willing to put effort into this. I like her a lot, and don't want to lose her as a friend.
I met with Rodrigo today too. I feel like he's hiding something from me, I just don't know what it is yet. Maybe its this whole girlfriend thing, does she exist? And I don't understand why he is such a nice guy and why he is helping me out so much, everyday he has done some other great thing for me, finding websites, job offers, school information. I am continually blessed with finding the right people/
Ugg, except I am too scared and proud to give one other potentially great person a call - I really want to savor some of the relationship with carlos, why don't I just call and apologize for being a jerk.
That's why I didn't go out tonight, because I am too stupid and proud to make any friends. Shame on me. This is not how you survive in a foreign country.
Tomorrow Daniel and I are meeting for a picnic/class. I am kind of worried about this turning into a friend relationship instead of a teacher relationship and then him not wanting to pay me anymore. I am worried at sucking at my job as a conversation teacher -some I feel its really great help, and others like I am wasting their time and money - james and ana for example.
I need to be doing better about reading my scriptures/aka the bom, I need to search its words and the words of our modern prophets. Who am I if I do not read them?